


Tales of a Coffee Shop

by Felinis



Category: Tales of Vesperia
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Comedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-08
Updated: 2017-02-08
Packaged: 2018-09-22 22:48:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9628658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Felinis/pseuds/Felinis
Summary: It's a normal day at work for Flynn when he spots an odd customer in the back. Who are they? More importantly, what sex are they?





	

**Author's Note:**

> This was written as a giant fuck you to my creative writing teacher for doing a terrible job.

"Who's that?" Flynn asked as he peeked out the corner of his eyes at the person wearing skinny jeans and a black turtleneck sitting on one of the back tables of the shop. He noticed them offhandedly while preparing another customer's drink.

His coworker, Judith a woman who, despite her age, had not outgrown the habit of dyeing all of her hair bright colors (this month was purple), looked at him and shrugged. "I dunno. They showed up a few hours ago, grabbed a mocha, and haven't moved since." She looked back to her customer at the register. "What's your name, sweetie?" She asked the girl at the counter as she pulled a pen out of her high tied bun.

"Estelle." The short haired girl sort of whispered as Judith jotted down her name.

"Got it." Judith printed out her receipt and passed it him. He adjusted his glasses. Large white caramel macchiato with extra cream. God, did nobody just drink coffee by itself anymore? Whatever, it wasn't part of the job to question the patrons' whims. "What's got you interested?" Flynn pinked a bit and she laughed. "Awww! You think the mocha drinker's cute." She draped an arm around his shoulders and noogied his head.

"Shut up! Do not!" He said, batting her off while managing not to spill Estelle's drink.

"Do too! Your think so too, right, Estelle?"

"Huh?"

Judith laughed as she hung onto the poor man. "I'm pretty sure my coffee boy's got a thing for that beauty in the back." She pointed. "You agree with me right?" How did this idiot become the manager?

The poor girl fidgeted and looked like she was about to run away. "Um, sure. She is very pretty." Flynn paused and took a second glance at the long inky hair tied into a loose high ponytail.

"So that's a chick?" Judith said raising her brow. "Are you sure? The shoulders are a bit too wide."

Estelle looked very confused. "Well, yeah. She's got long hair, of course she's a girl."

He set the drink down at the pick-up station and rolled his eyes. Here we go again. "Sweetie, if we determined gender by hair then many, and I mean many, people would have extreme sexual frustration when it comes to Legolas." He handed the girl the drink and mouthed for her to run. "The _Lord of the Rings_ in general would drive many insane." Another customer at the register tried to grab Judith's attention. "Just think of the dwarves. They have beards and long hair." The girl grabbed the cup and slowly started to back away. "It's so much controversy in one movie!"

"Judith, shut up. You're scaring the customers."

They were silent for a while before they switched positions. "So she is a she. Darn I was hoping I could tease you more."

"Yeah, well, what are you gonna do?" He sighed as he typed up another order. Double shot latte, hold on the foam.

The day ended and finally the customer with black hair left.

Flynn came in to work that day and was a bit surprised. He'd taken a later shift, and when he walked in, the customer from yesterday was there. His hands were numb from the cold and he saw them sitting at the seat by the window again. Their hair was down and fell down their back. They were wearing almost the same getup as yesterday, only this time, there was a pale scarf. From here Flynn could see metal studs in their ears and their jawline. And then he noticed how their frame wasn't really delicate nor small. He changed into uniform and got behind the counter again.

"Hey Judith." She gave a small hum of acknowledgment. "Are we sure that's a girl?"

"Oh, you mean the mysterious mocha drinker over there?" She said and handed him a receipt as he hummed. "Yeah, I was thinking the same thing." She paused to deal with a customer. "Them shoulders are just too wide."

Flynn passed off the drink and called the name on the cup. "Got a frappuccino for Alexie." He grabbed the next order. "Totally. Plus, their jaw looked a little thick."

"I wish I knew their name."

"You didn't get it?" Flynn was surprised. Judith was usually so diligent in her work. She never missed a name.

She sighed. "No. I was on break." Another customer. He looked at the receipt. Chocolate caramel chai tea latte. Eww. "I tried asking Raven but he's useless." Raven was a veteran at the Comet, the shop they worked at, but was a slacker who had never managed to actually get any real work done. The guy probably hadn't even looked at the customer. "And Rita... well, you know Rita." Rita was a newer employee who, despite being very good at the job, never actually paid attention.

Her excuse was always, "There's no need for me to remember their names."

"Darn. Keep an eye out then." They were still sitting there and typing something out on a laptop. "What do you think they're doing?" She shrugged. "Yesterday they just sat there a few hours."

"Who knows. How's school doing?" And like that the conversation trailed off until a few minutes before closing and the mocha drinker threw out their cup. Judith rummaged in the trash for a minute and pulled out a cup. "This is it. I didn't write this one." She looked at it and was puzzled.

"Judith! Don't go rummaging in the trash!" She ignored him.

"Huh?" Her face crinkled. "Hey, is Yuri a boy's name or a girl's name?"

Flynn paused. Yuri? Weird name. He pulled out his phone. "Let me check." He scrolled around for a minute or two. "Looks like both. It's a girl's name in Japanese, but a boy's name in Russian." They groaned. The two left and tried to forget about the person named Yuri. Curse curiosity they both thought.

They both unfortunately had the next few days off. Flynn showed for a late shift and, like last time, Yuri was sitting by the window. This time they were wearing headphones and fiddling out a tune on their fingers. He rushed behind the counter where Judith was. "It's driving me crazy."

"I know." She said as she passed register duty off to him. "I keep going back and forth."

"Yeah, 'cause I keep thinking with that build it's gotta be a dude."

"But, then you see they've got serious apple bottom. I'm so jealous." Flynn rolled his eyes. She had no room to complain. Seriously, Judith had the more curves than a racetrack. "Then I start thinking about the legs and I'm like 'Judy, that's gotta be a girl' and then I look at the arms. Ugh!"

"This would be so much easier if we could just ask them." He muttered mostly to himself.

"Or if they just got another drink." Judith hissed. "Large Soy Latte for Cumore." A man dressed in a truly ridiculous outfit picked up the drink. The two watched the man in black leather pants and a pink shirt and twisted their faces. "That was so a guy."

"So a guy." Flynn stared back at Yuri. "Seriously, they come in everyday and grab a mocha? Why? They aren't even doing anything."

"Plus they keep sipping from the cup. It has to be empty by now." Iced coffee. Finally! Something sane. "And when do they go to the bathroom?" One chocolate scone and an a Americano.

"Here's a thought." He gave her a stern look. Judith's thoughts were usually not worth following. "What if- just 'if' one of us takes a picture with our phone. If we get a picture of their face we'll know for sure."

That wasn't a half-bad plan except for one thing. "What if we can't tell from their face?"

"We'll just see if they're Asian or not."

"WHAT?" The people around looked to him and he felt a bit red. He hushed. "Judith we can't do that. That's racists and stuff!"

Judith pouted and capped off a cup. "Oh, I thought it was a great plan." Two raspberry tarts. "Switch with me."

They traded off. "Um, no. That is a terrible plan. And what if they're like a girl with a boy's name or vice versa. Then we'll be both racist and clueless." Judith stopped in her tracks and cupped her chin.

"Huh." She crinkled her brow. "I guess you're right." He sighed in relief until she spoke a minute later. "I guess you'll just have to go up and ask."

"WHAT?" The same result from before. "No. Just no. I'm not going to walk up to someone and ask what's in the pants! You do it."

"But it's no fun if I do it."

"What does fun have to do with any of this?"

"I really wanna see the look on your face." Flynn rolled his eyes. Judith was such a kid.

"Well, if you won't ask, then we'll just have to wait." One espresso.

Flynn had grabbed the earliest shift he could, but was still too late. Yuri was already there this time reading a large book with an open laptop. Looks like he wouldn't be finding out today. Rita was on duty for about an hour with him before she'd leave and Judith would step in. So he grit his teeth through Rita's constant complaining about how she thought the job was a waste of her valuable time. When Judith arrived he sighed in relief. Finally.

She got behind the counter and took the register. "Any news?" He shook his head. It looked like there wasn't going to be any headway on Yuri today. They both got into routine. Looks like Alexie's still getting hazelnut frappuccinos.

And then, a miracle happened. A little blonde girl probably no older than ten walked in and ran up to Yuri calling their name.

"Oh my god! It's got a kid!" Judith rasped as she took the order. "I'm calling it. Single parent. If you had any interest beyond gender, abort mission."

He bit his top lip. "They could be siblings or something."

"Yeah, and this," She pulled on a loose strand of purple, "is my natural hair color." The little girl pestered at Yuri and with a laugh they headed to the register. "Looks like we get to solve the mystery today." Flynn watched nervously as the duo approached. This would answer the dire question, and he hoped he didn't respond when they talked with something stupid.

Yuri was almost there. Just a few more customers. From here he could see that Yuri had dark thick eyebrows. The kind you saw on female celebrities. They had beautiful full lips like a princess, but Flynn felt the moment they spoke he'd hear nothing but insults. And the cheekbones! God, were they sculpted. Chin. Look at the chin. The chin was not round nor square. Perfectly ambiguous. Check for an Adam's apple. Really? Did you have to wear a turtleneck? Uhg! Chest! Chest! Look at the chest. Flynn felt like he was going to scream. Flat chest! That equals guy, right? Wait! What is that waist? That's an hourglass figure. So girl? Two more people. Just two more customers!

Flynn almost stopped breathing. Don't say something stupid! He looked at Yuri's almond eyes. They had a dark storm cloud color to them that tensed the blood in his veins. Great, he couldn't tell if they were Asian or whatever. Please, for the love of God don't say something stupid. The kid looked at Flynn and glared. Focus on the coffee. One medium Americano and one small ice coffee.

This was it. He swallowed. He would finally learn the great mystery of Yuri. One iced mocha breve and a blueberry scone. The little girl had herself attached to Yuri's thigh and looked at the board earnestly. Their mouth opened and Flynn waited to hear the voice that would determine once and for all what they were.

"Alright, Patty, what do you want?" Flynn stopped breathing. The voice was rich, pleasant, and most assuredly a man's.

The girl's eyes lit up and she jumped from the man's thigh. "I want one of those and one of those," she pointed at a chocolate custard tart and a cannoli. "And I want a large chocolate hazelnut caramel strawberry Chai tea frappuccino with extra- no make it triple the whip cream." He sighed inwardly. Kids.

He turned to Yuri. "What about you, sir?"

"Nothing for me. She's drinking enough sugar for twelve." Patty pouted and stomped on his foot. "Ow! Patty!" She looked away and upturned her nose. "Brat!"

"Uncle Yuri, you're so mean! You've been avoiding me all week, and when I finally find you, I learn that you've been hiding in a dumb coffee shop all day!" She whined and looked like she was about to start throwing a tantrum right in the room. "I came all this way to visit you and... And... And it's no fair for you to act this way!" He passed the receipt to Judith. Hopefully this turned out well.

The man knelt down and patted the girl's head. "Look, Patty, sometimes adults need alone time." Yes, about four to six hours' worth of it. "Plus, you're here for a month, so we have plenty of time to hang out." He was silent and he eyed Flynn as if asking for help.

Flynn coughed. "Umm, excuse me, but how about you talk about this over your drinks? And then you can decide on something you can do over the weekend." Yuri was about to speak but he stopped him. "Don't worry, this one's on the house. One mocha, right?"

Yuri stood up. "Yeah, thanks..."

"Flynn."

"Yeah, thanks Flynn."

"We'll really hang out?" Patty asked softly.

"Yes." Flynn passed one more receipt off to Judith. "Sorry about that." Flynn waved him off. He'd handled a fair number of situations like this in the past.

"One large frappuccino, one cannoli, one chocolate custard tart, and one mocha for Patty." Judith called.

"See you around." And then everything went back to normal as the two sat down to chat.

Judith looked over at the two at the table and gave a wry grin. "So he's a boy." She pouted. "I'm a little disappointed." She stretched her arms. "I was hoping to set him up on a date with Rita. Switch with me." The two switched off again. Two ice coffees. "What about you? You thought he was pretty and stuff. You gotta be crushed."

Flynn paused and bit his lip. "No. Not really."

Judith arched her brow. "Really?"

He shrugged. "Yeah."

"You got over that fast."

"Not really." He called out an order.

"Oh? Why's that?"

Flynn set down another four cups and called before setting back to work. "I'm gay."


End file.
